The Unkut Guide To STD Rap
Monday May 11th 2009,
Filed under: Features,Not Your Average,Steady Bootleggin',The Unkut Guide
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From Ol’ Dirty‘s admission that he “got burnt twice but it was only gonorrhea” to KRS-One‘s request that you “do me a favor and wear your hat”, getting burnt has been a staple of tasteless rap tracks forever. There are dozens of cautionary tales revolving around hitting it raw, but these five are the most graphic, and therefore the most entertaining.1

Kool Moe Dee - ‘Go See The Doctor’

The blueprint of this here STD Rap movement. Also noteworthy for the fact that Moe decides to insist all potential bedroom partners get a check-up before he knocks any boots. Guess he was too cheap to splash out on Trojans…

Cam’Ron – ‘On Fire Tonight’

Don’t be fooled by the punk smoove shit music, this is no love song – unless you consider executing anyone who burns you to be type-romantic.

EPMD - ‘Mr. Bozack’

Erick Sermon playing the part of PMD‘s Bozack? PAUSE!

Bust Down - ‘Pissin’ Razor Blades’ (Club Mix)

You know you caught a bad one when you can’t even make it into the studio the next day.

Ice Cube - ‘Look Who’s Burnin”

The ‘Bitch Killa’ at his finest: “You shoulda put a sock on the pickle/and your pussy wouldn’t be blowing smoke signals!”

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and get a ‘physical’…

  1. 1. Tribe’s ‘Pubic Enemy’ wasn’t included on account of being far too tasteful for this round-up.[back]

12 Comments so far
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Haha! I remember my friends crying off Kool Moe Dee talking down that doctor’s needle:

“I’ll put it down if you want me to put it/But don’t blame me if it turns into a foot ex/tended from the middle of ya body/And the next time you see the cute hottie/You wont be able to screw, the only thing you can do/Is just KICK HER -so take karate!”

Actually saw Moe Dee in Harlem at that McDonald’s on 125th near the Apollo – dude had them white gloves and ski goggle-shades on! We nearly passed the fck out laughing!

Comment by Qrush 05.11.09 @

Dope ass article my duke.

Now check out my comedy with a bunch of different A- Celebrities and Double D- List Celebrities.

youtube.com/freshdabarber888

My comedy is on fire

Comment by Fresh Da Barber 05.11.09 @

daffy duck lookin bitch burnt me,
correction
urinary tract infection,
what i got for no protection

nas “remember the times”

Comment by Jaemusiq 05.11.09 @

Check out “stanky panky” by 3xKrazy feat. The Luniz. Bay Classic. Love the blog.

Comment by dameSTATUS 05.11.09 @

um how can you forget..
BIG L – Shoulda wore a rubber (the clinic)

best of all.

Comment by BrooklynNY 05.11.09 @

^ Good point.

Comment by Robbie 05.11.09 @

BKNY!!!! How did I forget Big L!!!
But I must be gettin older/’Cuz I didn’t put a helmet on my muthaf*cking soldier!
I started stickin it up quick/and next time I took a piss, a muthaf*ckin flame shot out my dick!!!

Classic!

Comment by Qrush 05.11.09 @

“fuckin these hoes without a rubber these days is like bungy jumping with the rope around your neck”

*full clip intro* BIG L..RIP

Comment by BrooklynNY 05.11.09 @

wu tang’s TEARS? probly not graphic enough tho. i do remember, even as a young’un thinkin it was kinda weird with parrish rappin from the perspective of the bozack. or even them havin a song literally just bout their junk. PAUSE like a muhfucker

Comment by done 05.11.09 @

EPMD WHOS BOOTY HANDS DOWN

“smelt like shrimp or lobster or tuna of the sea”
“you can call me gay or tuti fruity but i wont touch it, until i know whos booty”
“ill be gentle ill be very gentle when im lovin u….when im lovin uuuu.”

Comment by Mercilesz 05.11.09 @

Its a damm shame ODB is gone. He could of done a great Swine Flu Pandemic joint.

Comment by ED209˚ 05.13.09 @

oh dag, the archetypal std song that immediately comes to mind when i think of std rap is the song std by necro, that shit had me laughing so hard after the first 30 seconds or so into it the first time through

Comment by gstatty 05.16.09 @



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