You could be excused for believing that I spend every waking hour obsessing over rap trivia while preparing for my next interview with an obscure hip-hop character, but that’s not really the case. Admittedly, a lifetime of perusing linear notes and thumbing through old rap magazines can tend to have some unwanted side-effects, but beyond my search for the lost TJ Swan album, there are – in the words of Zev Love X – more than ‘two on my list of shit I don’t give a fuck about’ when it comes to popular hip-hop folklore.
1. The ‘T.R.O.Y.’ controversy – Having spoken to both parties involved, I refuse to indulge this petty feud any further. Even if Large Professor’s dear old mother gave him the Tom Scott record for his 16th birthday and Pete faked an asthma attack so that he could steal it while Paulie ran off to call 911, I just don’t care.
2. Likewise when Pete played ‘Juicy Fruit’ for Biggie. Oh, Puff figured out he could make the same record without paying you? Welcome to the music business, guy.
3. Freddie Foxxx not turning up for the ‘Eric B. Is President’ session – Big deal. He eventually made an album with Eric – which it had it’s moments – but didn’t exactly feature anything of the caliber of ‘My Melody’, did it?
4. Rakim’s Lost Big Daddy Kane Diss Track– After attempting to confirm the existence of ‘Break The Wrath In Half’, it was recently revealed in Angus Batey’s HHC interview with The R that there were but six bars aimed at Dark Gable in the original version of ‘Let The Rhythm Hit ‘Em’. Bit of a let-down, really.
5. Which Beats Did Marley Marl Really Make? This was interesting for a minute until it became clear that every rapper that he ever worked with considers taking a few records into the studio ‘producing’. If you didn’t touch the sampler or the drum machine, you didn’t produce shit.
6. Eric B. Ran Kool G Rap Out Of New York – Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.
7. K-Solo Stole ‘Spellbound’ from DMX While In Jail – Based on Dark Man X’s recent antics, I’d say his version of events is about as trust-worthy as a Jerry Heller record contract.
8. KRS-One Didn’t Throw PM Dawn Off The Stage – Technically, BDP heavy ICU punched Prince Be and Just-Ice pushed him off the stage, but I guess that doesn’t sound as good.
9. Anything Jaz-O Says About His ‘Son’ Jay-Z – Let it go, duke.
10. Nas Recording With Any Of The Illmatic Producers Again – If you’re still waiting for Illmatic Volume 2 then you need to get out the house more. It’s no longer 1994 and lightening doesn’t strike twice.
A version of this piece was originally published in Hip-Hop Connection Digital 001.
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