The Unkut Guide To Vertically-Challenged Rappers
Friday October 22nd 2010,
Filed under: Not Your Average,The Unkut Guide,Unkut Originals,Video Clips,Weed Holders
Written by:

Thought that Bushwick Bill was the only player in the Short Rap game? You thought wrong. Actually, you’re pretty much correct, but there have been a couple of other minor contenders that you may have forgotten…

Bar None

Once a rap group reaches a certain level, they can spawn off-shoot groups. There was a brief craze of naming crews as the ‘Baby’ version of an established brand, which resulted in The Poison Clan being dubbed ‘The Baby 2 Live Crew’ on their first LP and Too Much Trouble taking on the ‘Baby GETO Boys’ title. In sticking to the script, they attempted to out-do their seniors by recruiting a white midget redneck to the group. Bar None had a brief but glorious run, and will forever be remembered for his contributions to Ignorant Rap on songs such as ‘Invasion Of The Purse Snatchers’ and ‘Take The Pussy’. You can see him in action in the ‘Fugitives On The Run’ video, before he was unceremoniously kicked-out of the group after Ghetto MC and Drunk D tried of the gimmick.

Joe C

Kid Rock‘s weed carrier is sadly no longer with us, but during his brief time in the spotlight he informed us that he was ‘three foot high with a ten foot dick’ and got himself a Simpsons cameo.

Verne Troyer

Not actually a rapper, but he did a parody video of ‘Hard Knock Life’ in one of the Austin Powers movies and had a sex tape, which is more important these days than actually rapping.

Bushwick Bill

The Little Big Man is the undisputed GOAT of little rappers, as ‘Size Ain’t Shit’ demonstrated. It’s also worth noting that ‘Ever So Clear’ is one of the greatest rap songs ever, as it manages to perfectly combine comedy and tragedy as Bill recounts that infamous night when he tried to get his girl to shoot him in the head. Salute!

Tweet about this on TwitterShare on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestShare on RedditShare on TumblrDigg thisShare on StumbleUponEmail this to someone

10 Comments so far
Leave a comment

crazy.never knew there was a tmt video.p on that dead mf.and bill had his moments.everyone else falls of short.

Comment by swordfish 10.22.10 @

mobb deep don’t get no love?

Comment by binstar 10.22.10 @

Andy Milonakis? Lil’ Wayne? Ja Rule? Prodigy?

Not to label but these guys are midgets not vertically challenged.

Comment by Sam 10.22.10 @

Phife? 5FT?

Comment by keatso 10.22.10 @

Buckshot, dmx,killa sha

Comment by dj dopefiend 10.23.10 @

Who’s The Biggest little mutha fucka you know?

Comment by Chubz 10.23.10 @

lil’ cease always seemed like he was tiny in comparison to everyone else, maybe it was just when standing next to biggie. Die Antwoord’s DJ Hi-Tek (blatant rip-off of the name of Reflection eternal’s DJ and producer) is also height impaired, probably cause he has progeria. There needs to be more midgets and fat people in rap.

Comment by gstatty 10.23.10 @

reminds me of that clip of Beetlejuice tryin to spit two lines and failing lol

btw the guy with progeria in that video isnt in the group, he’s a south african artist

Comment by Jeffluv 10.23.10 @

Bushwick’s ‘Little Big Man’ is one of my fav Rap A Lot releases. Altho ‘Face and D wrote most of his rhymes I always enjoyed his features. Might as well put Eazy in that list.

Comment by The Funkologist 10.25.10 @

I thought Gangsta Nip wrote most of his lyrics on the first LP.

Comment by Jasper 10.28.10 @



Leave a comment
Line and paragraph breaks automatic, e-mail address never displayed, HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

(required)

(required)