No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The CRC Guide To Modern R&B
Here’s the guide to acceptable sanging according the to Conservative Rap Coalition guidelines, which are as narrower than the street of Spreuerhofstraße in Reutlingen, Germany.
No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The CRC Guide To Modern R&B
Twenty Classic Literature Updates
As the CRC empire expands, it’s only right that a literary publishing arm of the organization is established. The following is a list of our first twenty re-boots of some timeless examples of the written word.
Rob Kelly – Jack The Ripper 2 [The Ripper Returns]
Rob Kelly is a paid-up member of the CRC and a drunken Irish hooligan with an ear for good beats. Like all good organizations, being part of the Conservative Rap Coalition automatically grants you access to the finer things in life, one of which is getting your music posted on Unkut on the condition that it doesn’t suck and is deemed suitably non-progressive.
CRC Polo’s Have Shipped!
At long last, the Mom’s Basement Activity Pack‘s have been shipped out, while the tape/zine only packs will go out tomorrow. The Executive Class zine and Mom’s Basement Pause Tape are now sold out, but there may be a second small run of polo’s due to a lot of requests. Stay tuned.
Marco Polo feat. Large Professor, Inspectah Deck, O.C, Tragedy Khadafi & DJ Revolution – Astonishing
One of the highlights of the forthcoming Marco Polo album PA2: The Director’s Cut, as Large, Rebel INS, O.C. and Trag all go in. DJ Revolution steals the show, however, with what can only be described as scratching so great it should be illegal.
Video: Sadat X – We In New York
The Great Dot X can’t stop, won’t stop. From the forthcoming New York: Never Left LP.
File Under: Predictible G Rap Write-Up
Complex compiled a list of who Rap InternetS consider their favorite rapper dudes (and dames, as it turns out). I did my duty as a CRC representative and explained why KGR is the nicest on mic devices and all that stuff, because clearly no one else was going to.
Rap Bloggahs Favorite Rappers
CRC Polos, Zine and Tape Orders Closing This Weekend!
Meet the team of under-age workers who will be producing your packs in an 1890′s style workhouse.
Regular service will resume shortly, but in the meantime if you’ve been saving up your loose change to order the Mom’s Basement Activity Pack, order’s will be closing off Sunday night and going into production Monday. Don’t miss out for the chance to own the first ever Rap Blog Polo in the history of the internets, the premier issue of Executive Class magazine or the lo-fi delights of the Mom’s Basement Pause Tape tribute to Kool DJ Red Alert and Chuck Chillout…
Can’t afford a CRC polo? Cop an Executive Class zine and tape instead.
Just blown all your cash on GTA V or a hooker? Never fear. For those of you who aren’t quite ready to take the plunge and join the elite group that are Conservative Rap Coalition polo owners, we are now going back on the claim of “will not separate” and offering the joys of Executive Class Volume 1 and the Mom’s Basement Pause Tape for the more affordable price of $5 each, plus postage.
Executive Class / Mom’s Basement Pause Tape Packs without the polo:
Video: J-Zone – Gadget Ho
First video from J-Zone‘s Peter Pan Syndrome album, out now on cassette and CD.
Pre-Order: The Mom’s Basement Activity Pack – CRC Polo, Zine and Pause Tape
A mere three years since I first discussed doing some Unkut.com t-shirts, and the first Mom’s Basement Activity Pack is finally complete. This is a limited-edition pack of only 100 editions, being offered for pre-order for the next two weeks only, with your pack being shipped the week beginning 7 October, 2013.
This glorious package contains the following essential items:
1. The official Conservative Rap Coalition embroided polo, made from TrueDry mesh [160gsm, 60% Cotton, 40% Polyester], available in the classic set of “stormy” colors.
2. Mom’s Basement Pause Tape, Volume One – a 60-minute cassette tape featuring promos, skits and exclusives from my personal collection of recordings from Kool DJ Red Alert and DJ Chuck Chillout Kiss-FM shows, plus some extra stuff stolen from the internets.
3. A 32-page b&w zine called Executive Class, Volume One, featuring classic comment section wars, removed content and exclusives from the Unkut archives.
4. A personal letter of thanks from myself for supporting the CRC cause and possibly helping me escape from the basement for another month before the end of the year.
Now is your chance to stand-up and be counted as a CRC trooper, and reject the folly of “streetwear” with this official tissue, pioneering advance in Rap Blog fashion. All of this can be yours for only $65, and will not be sold separately or reprinted.
Introducing The New Conservative Rap Coalition Logo
Official CRC polo’s will be available this week as part of the exclusive Mom’s Basement Activity Pack…it’s a new dawn of reactionary rap listening! The Neo Con Rap Country Club is getting closer. Before long, we will be able to enjoy non-progressive rap over Jameson without a non-collared t-shirt or pair of short pants in sight. Peace to Theotis Jones for his fine work for the cause.
Coming Soon: The Mom’s Basement Activity Pack
The future is now. In a last ditch attempt to escape Mom’s Basement again, I’ve been working on an “activity pack” that will be available for pre-order in the next couple of weeks. Put together with the limited resources at my disposal (safety scissors, glue stick, a photocopier, a double tape deck and a pile of 70′s Penthouse magazines) I’ve managed to piece together the following:
1. The world’s first official Conservative Rap Coalition t-shirt, sporting our all-new corporate logo.
2. A 60-minute tape featuring promos and exclusives from my collection of 80′s Red Alert and Chuck Chillout radio shows on one side, and my favorite mid-90′s Tim Westwood Capitol One Rap Show moments on the flip.
3. A 32-page zine called Executive Class, featuring classic comment section wars, removed content and exclusives from the Unkut archives.
This will be a super-limited edition package, only available via pre-order and limited to a maximum of 100 editions. Consider yourselves warned!
Video: The Doppelgangaz – On The Rag
Here’s the latest video from Hark, featuring some quality Rap Hands action from yours truly, as well as bastardized attempt at the G-Dep Harlem Shake.
The Yeezus Pub Quiz
Written and hosted by Phillip “The Jogging Blogger” Mlynar.
June 18th was a monumental date in hip-hop history — it was the day when all the Yeezus reviews came out. They involved lots of great commentary on the parameters of genius and musings about just how much of a genius Kanye West is. Unfortunately, they were also all really wrong. So the Unkut braintrust decided to review Yeezus in the only scientifically accurate way possible – in the form of a pub quiz.