Rap Albums To Get Stuck On A Desert Island With [2000-2015 Edition]

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If, by some tragic turn of fate, all rap released prior to the year 2000 was somehow obliterated from the face of the earth and you were given the opportunity to take twenty CD’s to pass the time while I wasted away in exile on some deserted island (stay with me here), then what would you take? I considered the options this afternoon and devised the following list of hip-hop platters to bring along.
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The Unkut Guide To Greg Nice’s Human Beatbox Career
Thursday February 12th 2015,
Filed under: Bronx Bombers,Features,The 80's Files,The Unkut Guide
Written by:

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There once was a time when the human beatbox was an entertaining addition to 80’s rap songs, rather than something that you could do on into an iPad on your late night talk show. One of the unsung practitioners of this humble talent was Greg Nice, who lent his vocal percussive skills to no less than three crews before he teamed-up with Smooth B to make history. As revealed in my interview with CJ Moore, Greg Nice was down with the Nasty Comedians crew, which was originally Greg and Cool Nate-T. Their first single was released on Home Boys Only Records in 1985, the same label that CJ’s Small’s Chosen Few 12″ appeared on. As it turns out, the guy who owned HBO Records was Larry Davis, who would later rise to worldwide fame after he shot six cops in self-defense when they raided his sisters apartment in the Bronx.
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The Unkut Guide To Beeper Rap
Friday January 30th 2015,
Filed under: Features,Listicles,The Unkut Guide
Written by:

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Beeper’s seemed pretty great – although I never had cause to own one – what with the whole not having to speak to people until you can be bothered finding a phone booth thing. While there are dozens of songs that name check these trusty telecommunications devices, only a handful were savvy enough to actually utilize the distinctive sounds of the pager itself. Feel free to let us know if any other examples have been overlooked…

Update: Twelve new entries thanks to Rap Twitter and the comments section.

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Ten Examples of Kid Rap That Aren’t Embarrassing
Tuesday January 20th 2015,
Filed under: Features,Listicles,Not Your Average,The Unkut Guide,Where Are They Now?
Written by:

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Kid Rap became a fad in the early 90’s, but youngsters rapping has been going on since the beginning of hip-hop. Matter of fact, some of them had more to offer than shaved heads and shouted choruses. Tragedy and LL were sonning their peers back when they were 14 and 16, respectively. Meanwhile, Jeff from the De La Soul skits never made an album while those Quo clowns got Redman and Aaron Hall features on their album. Where’s the justice?
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The Unkut Guide To Nas Singing

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Nas luhs to rap. But he also luhs to sing hooks. Having declared that he was the “first nigga to sing a hook on some TJ Swan shit” on “Nastradumus”, it’s only right that his crooning efforts are rated using the Unkut TJ Swan Rating System (c) during this scientific study of his efforts to make like the rap game Keith Sweat over the years.
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Radio Stream: The Unkut Guide To The Best and Worst 80’s Rap Ballads

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The good folk over at PBS 106.7 FM invited me down to do a guest spot on Richie 1250‘s Stone Love program for Valentine’s Day, where I unleashed what I consider to be some of the best and worst examples of the dreaded 80’s rap ballad on unsuspecting listeners.



Track By Track: Diamond D Breaks Down The Stunts, Blunts & Hip-Hop Album

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Today marks ten years since I started Unkut Dot Com, and what better way to celebrate than to sit down with the original “Best Producer On The Mic” himself, Diamond D. Originally scheduled to take place in late 2012 to mark the 20th anniversary of his classic debut album, Stunts, Blunts & Hip-Hop, it wasn’t until last week that it finally happened. We began by discussing his timeless debut, track-by-track:

Diamond D: I’mma keep it a hunned with you, I only wanted twelve songs on there. But you’ve gotta remember in the early 90’s it wasn’t uncommon for an album to have 18, 19 songs. You look at Pete Rock‘s album, Mecca and the Soul Brother. You look at De La Soul‘s first album. If it had been up to me it wouldn’t have been 21 songs on that album. But Chemistry was just like, “We gonna just roll the dice and throw all the shit on there.” I can’t say which ones I would have left off, but I can tell you I ain’t want all 21 on there! But it seems like it’s good that they did that, because I never put out an album with them again.
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The Unkut 40 Oz. 2013

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The time is finally here for the CRC Top 40 for the year. The only rule is a maximum of one song per release, which is why a few people were able to sneak in two entries courtesy of a mixtape or street album. As you’ll see, much of the list is comprised of the usual suspects – we’re not called the Conservative Rap Coalition for nothing…

Download: The Unkut 40 Oz. 2013

Track listing:
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The Unkut Guide To The Top 30 Hip-Hop Producers of All Time
Sunday December 01st 2013,
Filed under: 45 Kings,Features,Listicles,Non-Rapper Dudes,The Unkut Guide
Written by:

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Since I threw out the statement that “I respect Jay Dee but he doesn’t crack my top 25” comment earlier, it’s only right that I back it up by providing the Unkut top 30 in no particular order. Send all hate mail to the usual address.
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No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The CRC Guide To Modern R&B

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Here’s the guide to acceptable sanging according the to Conservative Rap Coalition guidelines, which are as narrower than the street of Spreuerhofstraße in Reutlingen, Germany.

No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The CRC Guide To Modern R&B



Missed Dipset Beat Opportunities, Part 1

Why is it that The Heatmakerz, Swizz Beatz nor Dame Grease never snatched up this Giorgio Moroder 80’s epic from Stallone’s arm-wrestling magnum opus Over The Top? With it’s action packed synths, cock-rock geetar, tinny drum rolls and built-in chorus stabs, this could have been the tipping point for one of the numerous Dimplomats Diplomats weed carriers who never quite broke through.



Throwback Post: Big Men On Campus – Biggie Smalls Vs. John Belushi
Saturday March 09th 2013,
Filed under: Classic Ignorance,Features,Rest In Peace,Sizzle-chest,The Unkut Guide
Written by:

Two fatties at the height of their respective powers were taken from this small planet in the month of March – one, a waffle-guzzling comedian with an appetite for destruction. The other – the brother of the guy from K-9. Sixteen and thirty-one years ago, respectively, these two hedonistic maniacs checked-out, leaving gigantic shoes that have yet to be filled. But who was the most brolic of these two foodaholics? Here’s a super-scientifical breakdown:

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No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The Conservative Rap Coalition Style Guide

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The CRC is deeper than rap.

No Country For Old (Rap) Men: The Conservative Rap Coalition Style Guide



Complex Presents: The 15 Best Years In Def Jam History
Wednesday March 06th 2013,
Filed under: Crates,Features,Listicles,The Unkut Guide,Web Work
Written by:

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Time for another Complex list, this time around on a topic that’s close to my cold, cold heart – record label history. With 2013 marking 30 years in the business, I wrote about the best fifteen years of the iconic label, based on my highly-scientific formula of Sales x Influence x Artistic Merit x Coin Flip.

The 15 Best Years In Def Jam History



Nobody’s Smiling – The Unkut Guide To Entirely Humorless Rappers
Monday February 11th 2013,
Filed under: The Unkut Guide,Unkut Originals
Written by:

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Many cynical rap fans complain that today’s new rapper dudes are bufoonish clowns and a disgrace to hip-hop, but perhaps we should be more appreciative of these attempts to inject a little humor into the post-Fat Boys rap landscape. Here are eight rapper’s who are no joke:
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The Unkut Guide To Rappers Dissing The Source Magazine

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It’s tough being the Big Man On Campus in the wacky world of Rap Magazines. The Source had a great run where they were basically unchallenged for years – despite some good work from Hip Hop Connection in the UK, they couldn’t match the access that the Mind Squadd had to cutting-edge New York music for the first half of the 90’s. The influence that The Source had also made them a prime target for disgruntled rappers, all of whom seemed to believe that everything they released was worth “Five Mics” (you may recall Outkast complaining that their debut “only” received 4.5 mics in later tracks). Sometimes it was a little more personal, as was the case for Ice-T, Public Enemy and Cypress Hill, who were all directly criticised in columns and decided to fire back on record. The following is a collection of some of the more noteworthy attacks on the house that Sheck built.
*Updated*
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No Country For Old (Rap) Men: A Guide To Food Raps
Friday December 14th 2012,
Filed under: Booze!,Food Rap,No Country For Old (Rap) Men,The Unkut Guide
Written by:

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Chow down on this history of Food Rap. The Unkut Wine Matching Course will be taking enrollments at the start of 2013.

No Country For Old (Rap) Men: Food Raps



Download: Unkut Presents The 40 Oz. 2012

There goes another in year in rap. As Weirdo Rap and EDM Rap takes hold of the youf, it’s getting a little more difficult to pick-out 40 great examples of non-progressive rap that Mitt Romney would approve of. Neo-Con Hip-Hop to some. East-Coast Elitist music to others. We are the Conservative Rap Coalition, and we are legion. Sit back, grab a beer (or something stronger), and let this tape transport you back to a time when rap didn’t suck as much, and when drums mattered, loops were important and rapping about how awesome you were was still cutting-edge.

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No Country For Old (Rap) Men – Old Man Rap vs Grown Man Rap
Thursday August 23rd 2012,
Filed under: Old Moufs,The Unkut Guide,Web Work
Written by:

Attack of the old moufs…

No Country For Old (Rap) Men – Old Man Rap vs Grown Man Rap



New Rap That Doesn’t Suck – November 2011 Edition
Saturday December 03rd 2011,
Filed under: New Rap That Doesn't Suck,Newest Latest,Steady Bootleggin',The Unkut Guide
Written by:

As more and more new rap music continues to suck, the task of finding recent shit that doesn’t make me want to cut my face off with a broken bottle and slowly peel the skin off has become more and more difficult. Naturally, all of these songs are old news on the internets by now but if you’re reading this that clearly isn’t an issue for you anyway.

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Somebody’s Brother – The Unkut Guide To Rap Nepotism
Tuesday January 18th 2011,
Filed under: Nas Is A Douche,Not Your Average,Shots Fired,The Unkut Guide,Video Clips
Written by:

There have been some talented gene pools in hip-hop, where two brothers from the same mother have both shown and proved on skill and talent alone. And then there’s these guys…who needed a weed carrier when you’re own flesh and blood could carry your stash?
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Soap Opera Rap

It seems that every other week a new Rap Genre emerges from someone’s twisted imagination. Since it’s been almost a year since the first Unkut Guide on the subject, it ain’t no mystery that a lot of effed-up new styles have appeared. Without a doubt, the most prominent would have to be the Soap Opera Rap movement. This hideous new breed of cRap is the mutated step-child of Wrestlemania Rap, which was started by Melle Mel when he stole Mikey D’s NMS belt and finally perfected by Curtis aka 50 Cent and his endless beefs with other rappers who he eventually makes shitty songs with (see: 50 & Jadakiss’ appropriately named ‘Dump‘).
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The Unkut Guide To Vertically-Challenged Rappers
Friday October 22nd 2010,
Filed under: Not Your Average,The Unkut Guide,Unkut Originals,Video Clips,Weed Holders
Written by:

Thought that Bushwick Bill was the only player in the Short Rap game? You thought wrong. Actually, you’re pretty much correct, but there have been a couple of other minor contenders that you may have forgotten…
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Rap Rock Team-Ups That Make You Want To Break A Glass In Your Own Face
Monday October 18th 2010,
Filed under: The Unkut Guide,Unkut Originals,Video Clips,We Don't Rock We Rap
Written by:

Rock is one of the foundations of this great music we call hip-hop, having provided so many of the founding break beats that we all know like the back of our hands. At some point in the early 90’s, however, some evil genius figured out that really shitty rock and metal groups should get on the rap bandwagon, having been mortal enemies for years before that. The end result was of course Fred Durst, who’s only notable achievement was banging a bunch of girls who were way out of his league. Here are some of the Rap Rock collaborations that will make you want to take to your ears with a rusty razor…
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Unkut x Complex = The 50 Greatest QB Rap Songs

When the crew over at Complex decided they needed to put together a definitive list of the 50 Greatest Queensbridge Rap Songs Of All Time, who else were they gonna call? As is the nature of such projects, there was a little give-and-take between my initial chart and the finished result, but that’s part of the challenge and I’m more than happy with the final result:

Unkut.com Presents: The 50 Greatest Queensbridge Rap Songs Of All Time