The dream of any wannabe weed carrier in the early nineties was to hold for the rap powerhouse that was Public Enemy (read: Flavor Flav). The extent of his WC empire will be covered in my next post, but for now let’s pay tribute to the Young Black Teenagers. These kids somehow released two albums – no doubt as a reward for carrying huge quantities of coke for His Royal Clock Rocker. With light-hearted dedications to Al Bundy’s daughter (“Nobody Knows Kelly”), Madonna disses (“To My Donna”) and songs about opening bottles of beer (“Tap The Bottle”), these not-so-mighty whitey’s managed to offend just about everyone with their “controversial” group name (the brainchild of the Bomb Squad‘s Hank Shocklee, apparently) and the fact that they wasted an album full of Bomb Squad beats. Lead rapper Kamron, best known for his role as a racially-confused student in Kid ‘N Play‘s
“Fudge Party 5″ House Party 2, is currently shopping demo’s for his new Nu-Metal band, Black On The Inside$. They were also resposible for some exceptionally ghey-sounding lyrics:
“Brothers know my style, my grip is just TOO strong
So figure it out yourself and you’ll soon see that I don’t sweat ‘em
His back’s against the wall I say spread ‘em then I wet ‘im
So hi-ho hi-ho hi-ho, it’s off to work I go”
If that isn’t the most explicit description of man-love ever heard in a rap song, then I don’t know what is.
DJ Skribble has since managed to stay busy, and was even able to get a job on The Cindy Margolis Show, while his former bandmates seem to have dropped from the spotlight. Maybe they’re just really embarressed about the whole experience. Can’t say I blame them.
$ I just made that part up. There’s a 50% chance it’s true though.
Blood of Abraham provided the late, great Eazy-E all the weed carrying that Tarrie B wasn’t able to accomodate in her roomy “stash spot”, and with names like Benyad and Mazik, you just know these guys weren’t getting searched by the LAPD I can’t say that I ever heard anything that they put out, in cases like these the quality of the music runs a very distant second to the abiltity of the blunt rolling abilities. These days, they moonlight as weed (and in Fergie‘s case – crystal meth) holders for the Black Eyed Peas between “recording” sessions.
DJ Mike T carried MC Eiht‘s indo during the early days of Compton’s Most Wanted, back when The Chill MC was still rolling with ‘em. He assumed the role of DJ so that he could utilize his road cases for chronic transport without arousing suspition, ensuring that Eiht and DJ Slip were nicely toasted for the entire tour. Due to his long hair and love for thick gold ropes, however, Mike T had to retire from his weed stashing position when 5-0 mistook him for a speed-peddling head-banger and started breaking his balls.
Considering the number of hit records that The Neptunes have been involved in, they hardly need weed carriers anymore. But they obvioulsy started to enjoy soke of the luxuries of “making it” around the time of the first NERD album, and so they got themselves a white boy to hold their bags. Sadly, this lead to the holder in question getting on one of their songs (the closest thing a WC can ever get to actual payment for their hard work). Lee Harvey got his chance to “shine” om “Lapdance:
“You can find me drunk, whip it-it might crash
Or find me chillin with crackas, who like thrash
Find me in court smokin’ that nice grass
Burnin’ the flag, all in the name of white trash”
Despite clearly being the melanin-deficient version of Rakim, it seems that smoking the Chad and Skatebord P‘s “grass” with his cracka-ass cracka “homies” got him and his Harvey and his Harley fired.