A Salute To Weed Carriers

With the unfortunate news of T.I. and his wifed-up weed holder getting nabbed last week, it seems the ideal opportunity to spotlight some of the other more unsuccessful kush carriers in recent memory.

The Flipmode Squad: After Busta had a falling-out with Charlie Brown, who refused to stash his trees on GP as a member of L.O.N.S., Buss needed a new entourage to handle his ever-increasing carrying requirements as he embarked upon his solo career. First up to bat was his cousin Rampage The Last Boyscout, who started off OK but was soon distracted with putting together his own solo album (as is the want of every weed carrier). Busta wasted no time in expanding his operations, and before long he had collected a sizable group of bag handlers, who became known as the Flipmode Squad. The Flipmode wikipedia page reads like a weed carrier obituary of sorts:

Serious (1997)
Lord Have Mercy (1996-2000)
Roc Marciano (1999-2001)
Meka (1997-2003)
Rampage (1996-2006)
Papoose (2006-2007)
M. Dollars (2003-2007)
Labba (2003-2007)
Rah Digga (1997-2007)
Baby Sham (1997-2008)
Reek Da Villian (2006-2009)
DJ Scratchator (1996-2009)
Chauncey Black (2004-2009)
Show Money (2007-2009)

With all the jewelery holding, steroid stashing and massive quantities of hydro being carried, one-by-one the Flipmodians fell by the wayside, until only the ultimate cheeba stasher remained – the mighty Spliff Star. Salute this man, for he has endured drug busts in Swedan and released five mixtapes which nobody will ever hear (with titles such as ‘Contraband’ and ‘One Shot Willy’).

Young Buck: After dropping out of school to hold bags for Baby over at Cash Money, Buck tired of his role after four years and was recruited to the G-Unit, possibly to fill-in for Tony Yayo in-between ‘vacations’. Things were all gravy for a minute, but by 2008 he found himself kicked out of the Unit after he’d been spotted carrying bags for Lil’ Wayne. Judging by the tearful phone conversation that Curtis later leaked, it’s safe to assume that Buck also lost a few large bags of hydro which 50 wanted to be compensated for. To further rub salt in the wounds, he recently had his kids’ Playstation seized by U.S. Federal Agents as part of their attempts to recover unpaid taxes…

Weezy’s Non-Existant Carriers: Before putting the Young Money squad together, Wayne had a bad run of drug busts, leading many to believe that after so many years of holding for the older Hot Boys that he had no concept of what was involved in becoming a Weed Owner himself as his solo career flourished. Despite traveling with a crew, his tour bus was nabbed on two separate occasions between 2008-2009, and Weezy was nabbed with weed, coke, MDMA and pretty much everything else that you need for those long-ass bus rides between shows. The charge he’s currently serving time for stems from getting caught puffing trees outside his tour bus while in New York. Even though he was allegedly sharing the smoke with one of his boys, Wayne got nabbed with a biscuit, which seems inexplicable if he actually had any carriers at the time. We can only assume that it wasn’t until more recently that Lil’ Wayne woke-up to himself and started to get his shit together as a Weed Owner, although the fact that many of his intended weed carriers now own their own weed may be a problem in the future…

Ma$e: From his humble beginnings holding onto sacks for the late, great Big L and Killa Kam in the Children of The Corn era, Murda Ma$e cleaned-up his image and got the dream job in the rap world – carrying for Puffy! With an endless supply of shiny suits at his disposal, Ma$e knew that he was safe to carry weed for Diddy with no fear of ever being searched. Before long, he was allowed to become a Weed Owning Weed Carrier, juggling responsibilities between his holding for Sean Combs and assigning the left-over bags to his Harlem World weed holders (Mase’s sister Baby Stase, Blinky Blink, Cardan, Huddy, Meeno and Loon). When things took a downward turn with Double Up, Ma$e decided it was time to go and carry weed for the only person more powerful than Puffy at the time – God. Unfortunately G.O.D. must have had a better offer since Mason came back to music five years later. At this point nobody was really trying to let him stash anything, since who the wants to fux with someone who the Most High fired? His attempt to carry for Curtis proved fruitless, and most recently Ma$e was sighted carrying weed for Ron Browz, which basically means it’s time to jump out the window.